getting ready to head off yonder.

In less than 48 hours I have the chance to travel to fair Italia with some of my favorite people. If you want to follow the wanderings, adventures, and artistic discovery we are sure to meet, check out www.grace.edu/gograce/italy2011.

story of my life.

A dear friend shared this link with me. Being an introvert myself, I momentarily expressed my thoughts verbally while reading this article by running around my room shouting, "Finally someone understands me!" I have a particular fondness for one of the last bits that says, "When you see an introvert lost in thought, don't say "What's the matter?" or "Are you all right?" All of the sudden the scores of times I have been asked those very questions make a lot more sense. Blessings to those enduring souls who share the introverted condition and love to the dear extroverts who try to understand us :)

http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2003/03/caring-for-your-introvert/2696/

going back to something new.

A few remaining thoughts from the summer as I prepare to go back to school.

- There is not specific amount of time required for someone to earn an irreplaceable spot in your heart.

- I have a key.

- Age has little bearing on maturity if a person does not place a strong value on character and belief.

- It takes less time to destroy a relationship than it does to build one.

- If I were alive in the 1700's, I would have been a loyalist. I love the British.

- You can hurt deeply and be filled with joy at the same time.

- The deeper this latest wound festers in me, the greater my alertness to the depth of sorrow Christ endured to save me and to the weight of the word 'betrayal.'

- I miss pottery. Hardcore.

respite.

Every day seems to make it just a little harder for me to say that human relationships are worth all the heartache. I hope that sentiment changes soon.

"Have you ever been hurt and the place tries to heal a bit, and you just pull the scar off of it over and over again?" ~Rosa Parks

Medora information and reservations, this is Natalie. How can I help you?

I am back in the North of the land of Dakota with the buffalo, elk, rattlesnakes, prairie dogs, and a few dear friends. In my quiet time spent in the shadow of the Badlands and in the rush of insecurity that hits me every time I walk in the Badlands motel I have been pondering a few things.

- I have a natural tendency towards despair and only with divine help do I ever overcome it.

- Shoulder rubs feel amazing.

- Telepathy is an ability given to women that uses brief eye contact to point out the amusing parts of awkward situations, I don't care what the dictionary says it means.

- There is nothing that replaces time spent with my face pressed into those musty oak floorboards before my God.

- I love the Catholic idea that a church building should never be locked. I think I secretly came back to North Dakota just to live walking distance from an old Catholic church.

- There are awesome men in this world and they can actually speak great truth to you when you take off the mask filled with engagement rings, the hippest books Christian romance, and V-neck tees. (Thank you Jon Acuff) and breath the standard nitrogen, oxygen, pollen, dust, and diesel exhaust stuff.

- I like steak.

stretching. depth. love.

Last night was my last growth group of the year. What a year it has been! As a good leader, one of the things you are supposed to do is help your group gain closure and leave them with positive memories of growth groups through reflection. The part that is not mentioned is that to do so, you must reflect as well and that is a dangerous thing. I had expected that because I was serving in a role that seemed to fit my personality so well that this year would be easy. I assumed that caring for others would drive out my broken places and fill them with warm feelings of how good God is.
Here I sit. Filled with the wonder of how good God is but because he has spent the last year pointing out the depth of my broken places. He has pushed my face in the ocean that is my natural tendency towards despair and held me under until I could truly appreciate the beauty of air. It has been a long time since the depth of my depravity has brought me as much deep sadness as it has this last year. I have learned the most beautiful secret though. God loves me. Not "God loves me in spite of my depravity" or "God loves that I am depraved." But simply. God loves me. It makes no difference to his love how broken I am or how easily I seem to forget his love. He waits for me, as close as ever, and when I am ready, I find myself overwhelmed by the most steadfast and wild peace.
Last night my girls and I sat around and answered a bunch of reflection questions that I had put in a jar and passed around. The last question was "If you could pick three words to describe this year, what would they be?" My three words are stretching, depth, and love. What are yours?

it is a day for lovely things.

"Love is promise, love is a souvenir, once given, never forgotten, never let it disappear."- John Lennon

It is a day for lovely things.